Remember when: In loving memory

It's only fitting to begin...well from the beginning.  And it all began with: L O V E

Remember when you first started falling in love with him/her?  How you fought it cos you'd been single and independent for so long that the idea of breaking your wall down was just plain terrifying.  Especially considering all the years you put into creating this beautiful, protecting, shatterproof wall.  There was a sense of comfort hiding behind it.  But you couldn't stop seeing him/her, even when you told yourself that you wouldn't because you felt like you shouldn't.  Once a week turned into twice and twice turned into thrice and suddenly you can't go a day without hoping you will see him/her.  Cute texts and day dreams became the highlight of your day.  All of a sudden you wake up and yup, it happened to you, you became a cupcake. 

Remember the day you finally gave in and gave your heart out?  You became that "one girl" and you threw that little black book away.  That's right, threw it away.  You didn't hide it or let someone borrow it, you threw it away.  He was the man of your dreams and there was no doubt that you did not need that stupid little book anymore.  And the world knew it was real when you finally changed your status to: in a relationship and you held hands in public.  You slowly went from being "me" and transformed into "we", happily.

Remember when love was enough?  When it didn't matter how many lemons life threw at you because he was always willing to pull up a seat and share a lemon drop (Mmmmm, lemon drop).  When everything was fun and new and exciting and no matter what, it was all about you two.  It was like riding a natural high (yes, riding high.  Quite a combo if you ask me).  But you see, the thing about highs...is that there are always lows.  And when we got there we used to fight tooth and nail to make our way back to the top, together.  You told yourself that this man is worth the fight cos the love you shared was like no other.

And then remember when it all changed? When all the little sweet things became more and more sparse and then you began to nag.  When you went from being "the fun couple" that everyone called to hang out with to just the opposite.  When for years you would do anything to see the other person smile and now they smile without you.  That's when you realize, love is just not enough. 

But this is not a sad story, it's actually the opposite (after you are thru cursing his/her name and burning all their shit).  You finally except that you two just don't make sense, no matter how much you love each other.  But the best part is, you now have learned what you need vs what you think you want.  Take comfort in knowing that the next one will be better and if it's not....at least you are better prepared. 

The "we" no longer exists but you are perfectly content in finding that "me" again, minus the wall.